my ex-boyfriend invited me to go out on friday so he could introduce me to his current partner.
he definitely has a lot of cheek to send me an invitation. as if i will give in to his request! as if i have the time on friday to sneak them into my hectic schedule even though i really have nothing planned out for friday night! as if i am chummy enough to actually talk to his current boyfriend! and if i will indeed chat with his partner, does his partner have the ability to carry out a conversation? does his partner understand plain and simple english?
two years ago i would have said that and more actually. much much more. with wormwood flowing through my veins during that time, i would have made an utter fool of myself. a sign will be posted above my head with the words "complete jerk" and an arrow pointing downwards. for shame paci! for shame!
it was a good thing that time did heal the wounds and the scars that remain remind me that i have matured. a proof is that i feel no bitterness that my ex found happiness after his failed relationship after ours when here i am, still single after two years. perhaps i have grown to realize that most of the people that i meet will just come and then go no matter how i try to make them stay. that i should just cling onto the hope that i am enough reason to become part of their lives.
it is ironic that even though there are numerous avenues that would get me closer in finding a someone, nothing seems to happen. i have done the searching part, chasing even. did not work. so i tried to wait. i am still waiting. i guess i still need more time.
there are times when i feel happy for one person and yet i am sad for myself. this is one of those times.
he definitely has a lot of cheek to send me an invitation. as if i will give in to his request! as if i have the time on friday to sneak them into my hectic schedule even though i really have nothing planned out for friday night! as if i am chummy enough to actually talk to his current boyfriend! and if i will indeed chat with his partner, does his partner have the ability to carry out a conversation? does his partner understand plain and simple english?
two years ago i would have said that and more actually. much much more. with wormwood flowing through my veins during that time, i would have made an utter fool of myself. a sign will be posted above my head with the words "complete jerk" and an arrow pointing downwards. for shame paci! for shame!
it was a good thing that time did heal the wounds and the scars that remain remind me that i have matured. a proof is that i feel no bitterness that my ex found happiness after his failed relationship after ours when here i am, still single after two years. perhaps i have grown to realize that most of the people that i meet will just come and then go no matter how i try to make them stay. that i should just cling onto the hope that i am enough reason to become part of their lives.
it is ironic that even though there are numerous avenues that would get me closer in finding a someone, nothing seems to happen. i have done the searching part, chasing even. did not work. so i tried to wait. i am still waiting. i guess i still need more time.
there are times when i feel happy for one person and yet i am sad for myself. this is one of those times.
3 comments:
The moment you find yourself no longer needing the company of a partner to feel complete and whole, is the moment you'd realize that you truly have matured, and is now ready to be in a relationship. Because how can you share your life with another if your life isn't complete in itself? That's when the fate will conspire to bring you a mate worthy of who you are.
i couldn't have said it any better
This entry of yours means a lot to me as I'm still on the journey of getting there, in a place wherever you are. Medyo nagmamadali nga ako eh, gusto ko na kasing marating 'yan.
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